I often use the analogy for life’s decisions as hiking through a series of paths, with multiple forks leading to uncertain outcomes. The idea is the inspiration for this blog. Hopefully, you live a life replete with options from which to choose: what to study in school, when to change jobs, who to marry, where to live…

The challenge of course is trying to decide which path to choose. Some will say, “Go with your gut” (or heart, or maybe some other body part besides your brain). If your gut is able to take in all available information, weigh it based on your personal priorities, and then act decisively, terrific! For me, I never quite understood why my intestines are appropriate for this task. I go with my brain.

This does not mean everything will always work out as you hoped. I advocate for gaining whatever information you can, using the advice and experience of others you trust, and making a decision that provides the greatest probability of a successful outcome. If you are able to work through these probabilities for life’s decisions, you’ll be right more often than not.

However, this analogy of choosing life’s path to your whim is a little flawed. There will be times that not all options are available to you. A better analogy is paddling a boat in a river, with multiple tributaries leading off in many directions. Yes, you can paddle toward the direction that you wish based on the information you have gathered, but there is also a current, pushing you down certain directions whether you choose them or not. This may be an unfortunate revelation for a young person. Remember those kindergarten days where you were told “You can be anything you want!”. Well, probably not. Sorry. Sometimes life circumstances simply don’t allow you to have total control over everything in your life. This has been a difficult lesson for me to learn, and I still have to learn it more every day.

The situation is not dire though. Is the solution to just sit back, stop paddling, and let the current decide your fate? Of course not. You can and should still steer yourself in the direction you wish to go, but be aware that occasionally there be be dissapointments and paths that are inaccessible to you through no lack of effort on your part.

The good news is that some of my best life “decisions” were not always strictly speaking my choice. Occasionally I’ve paddled as hard as I could in a different direction, but life pushed me somewhere else. At the time, I thought it was a disaster, but in retrospect, ended up even better than had I truly chosen my route. Keep pursuing the direction you wish to go, but have confidence that when life deals you these disappointments counter to your wishes the end result may lead to life circumstances better than you had imagined.